Living with Birds ''The look of love '' by Nick Baker Tweetapedia

"The Look of Love" by Nick Baker

March 21st, 2025
7 minute read
Male Eurasian Siskin and Female Eurasian Siskin on a branch showing courtship behavior.
Male Eurasian Siskin and Female Eurasian Siskin on a branch showing courtship behavior.

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Warning, this article contains details of the sex lives of dunnocks!
It’s becoming quite obvious now. Spring is truly swinging, and accompanying the first of the years, flowers, bees, and even the occasional butterfly is a delightful soundtrack.

Other than the occasional sound of a passing bumblebee queen or a dor beetle recently emerged from hibernation, the main melody in the air comes from the throats of birds.

As I write this, outside my window, I have a dunnock (more about him later), a blackbird, a robin, a great tit, and both mistle and song thrush proclaiming their reproductive health and available nesting territories by shouting their message to the four winds.

Blue tit collecting lichen from tree branchWhen the blood runs hot like this, other behaviours become noticeable. The gathering of nesting materials is one; I watched a pair of long-tailed tits this morning collecting lichens from the trunks of trees. The fact that they are a pair is significant; just a few weeks ago, they would have been flitting around in a flock of compatriots, noisily foraging together, bundling through the woods, hedgerows, and even our garden feeders in search of titbits. The same deconstruction of the winter flocks applies to others as well. Finches like siskin, bullfinch, and chaffinch are also seen in couples. Watch the birds, and I mean really watch them, and you’ll be sure to see some courtship to accompany these other behaviours. Sometimes, it’s pretty subtle, and other times, it’s hard to miss.

Courtship rituals are essential; they have multiple purposes. They can help to attract a compatible mate,  advertise an individual’s health, parasite load and genetic fitness, and can be used to strengthen a pair’s bond and help prepare for the breeding season ahead.

Randy Robins

Let’s start with the Robin. To us, they all look the same; males and females are nearly impossible to separate unless copulation is witnessed. However, to other Robins, every Robin probably looks quite different. That iconic orange breast is like a flag. Look closely, and you might notice that some birds have more colour than others; some appear brighter, while others have a larger orange patch.

Robins on rose

Incidentally, I use the word “orange” rather than “red” here, as let’s face it, that’s what they are. We do, however, confusingly refer to them as ‘Robin Redbreast’ because, once before that familiar citrus fruit appeared in Britain, what we now call orange was a kind of red, while what we would now label red would have been scarlet. It wasn’t until the citrus fruit came along from a place called Naranja in Murcia— that mispronounced place of origin. ‘Nar-AN-je’ became ‘norringe’ and eventually ‘oranj(e)’. The same applies to our Orange Kite and fox!

Returning to the Robin itself, it has been found that the older, more experienced, or fitter males display a larger, brighter breast. It seems that those extra orange feathers, which can be tricky for us to notice, are precisely what a female Robin pays attention to. An older Robin is older because it is better at surviving. A female might interpret the subtext of his display as an indication that he is fitter, healthier, and has a better territory, among other things. This might also signal to younger males that he is one to steer clear of, for much the same reasons—namely, that ‘better at surviving’ translates to being ‘better at defending territory and fighting’.

You may notice pairs of birds chasing each other around your garden; sometimes, it can be challenging to tell aggressive posturing from sexual intent. Look out for birds flattening their feathers, dropping their wings, cocking their tails and bobbing. They often face off with one another - bills and tails pointing skywards. This is all aggressive behaviour, but it isn’t just the males doing this. Because both sexes hold their own territory over the winter, they will defend their space by aggressively posturing to any other male or female robin. Come the breeding season, old habits die hard, and often courting birds pairing up will initially go into antagonistic behaviour before being won over and being nice to each other. The dead giveaway, however, is courtship feeding (often seen around garden feeders) when the male collects food and the female, then, like a baby bird, starts begging for it, taking on a submissive pose, fluttering her wings and opening her mouth, until he feeds her.

The ‘dirty’ Dunnock

These small, introverted and furtive birds are well worth watching. They are easy to miss or simply take for granted. Once you get to know them, they are beautiful in both song and feather.

Almost every garden has at least one pair... skulking around in the bottom of the hedge or behind the garden shed, but they are reserved in appearance only. The sex life of the dunnock is so complex (some would say sordid) that it’s enough to make you drop your tea cakes!

The most common behaviour you might notice is a pair hopping around closely, following and mirroring each other’s movements, with the female bird up front. Watch closely; now and then, she’ll pause and cock her tail while vibrating her wings, and the male shadowing her will then aim a peck or two at her cloaca. This can go on for some time, often with other males joining in - eventually, there will be a blur of fluttering wings, and the male mounts her, and mating is complete. What is happening here is that the male is encouraging her to eject the sperm from a previous mating (see, I told you you would drop your tea cakes) before replacing it with his! 

Dunnocks foreplayEven this isn’t the end of the shenanigans. You see dunnocks have a very complex social and sexual system. Some are monogamous, one male and one female in a pair, nothing too difficult to get your head around here, but some females choose to solicit more of a ménage à trois and bond with two males; this polyandry is quite common. There are the males that establish bonds with more than one female - Polygyny, and just when you think we’ve exhausted all the options, there are sometimes groups of males that consort with three or four females! For which a word had to be invented especially - polygynandry! Why this occurs is interesting. Both males and females have their own independent territories and those of males are usually bigger, leading to overlap of serval female territories and this is when you get polygyny. However in some cases a territory has two or more males that defend a territory together, in such situations they work together but there will be one male the ‘alpha’ that gets more access to the females, than the betas.

It’s a trade off between getting help to work the territory and getting access to a female. If you’re feeling sorry for the females. Don’t. They get to play the field too, choosing who she mates with and who fathers her offspring.

Wooing and cooing

Wooing and cooing wood pigeonsMy garden is not a quiet place. Mainly down to Wood pigeons - their call -  ‘take two cows taf-fy’ is ringing out everywhere. At least 4 pairs have nests close by, which leads to friction, which, while seen any month of the year, is particularly evident right now.

They are highly territorial and the males will chase each other out of the area, which often leads to noisy ‘slap fights’ with males standing up to one another and whacking each other with their wings - it’s not elegant. However, courtship is a little more refined.

You may have seen the display flight of the males - when they fly high, and just as they reach the summit of their flight path, they slap their wings together over their backs before seconding at a steep angle with tail spread. This is all about advertising to others that he is the proud owner of a piece of pigeon real estate.

However, when he successfully attracts a female’s attention, he will begin more intimate displays. He’ll follow the female around, performing a strange yet surprising little hop, often accompanied by a deferential bow and a quick tail fanning. All the while, he puffs up his chest and emits subtle cooing and oohing noises. If permitted to come close, you may even witness a bit of mutual preening.

These are just a few of the behaviours to watch out for amongst our garden birds, obviously they are all ‘at it’ and it doesn’t take much close watching to start to work out what is happening.

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Observe closely the pairs of birds and individuals chasing one another, and you may begin to notice little stylised behaviours, strange and unusual postures, wing flicks or flutters, crests raised, and even some begging behaviours from females. Once you’ve tuned into the love language in your garden,it’s astonishing what you’ll start to observe. Now pick up those tea cakes and get your binoculars ready.

Nick Baker, naturalist, author and broadcaster
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